Five years after retiring from the New York Yankees, and in his first year of eligibility, Mariano Rivera was elected to Major League Baseball’s Hall of Fame. He was inducted during ceremonies in Cooperstown today (July 21). In 19 seasons, all with the Yankees, Rivera was a 13-time All-Star and five-time World Series champion. He set the MLB career record with 652 saves. But Mo is missed today as much for his brilliant success as for his elegant professionalism. For example:
- He never shot an imaginary arrow into the air after the final out.
- He never threw a jagged bat barrel at Mike Piazza.
- He didn’t drink beer and eat wings in the dugout when he wasn’t pitching.
- Cameron Diaz didn’t feed him popcorn at the Super Bowl.
- He never carried an unlicensed handgun in his sweatpants into a nightclub and shot himself in the leg.
- He never shimmied and pirouetted off the mound.
- George Steinbrenner never called him “a fat pussy toad” or referred to him as “Mr. May.”
- He didn’t hold a press conference to announce that he was taking his talents to South Beach.
- He never backflipped off the mound and spiked the ball.
- He didn’t marry a Kardashian.
- His obliques were not hidden beneath layers of fat.
- He never had to testify before Congress about steroids or HGH.
- He never angrily untucked his jersey at game’s end.
- Suzy Kolber didn’t have to ward off his attempt to kiss her.
- He never guaranteed a victory.
- He never blew on his finger and mimed holstering a gun after a third strike.
- He never said of the Yankees, “The ship be sinking.”
- He didn’t name his children “North” or “Apple” or “Ivy Blue.”
- He never “liked” something on Instagram while sitting on the dugout toilet.
- He never bro-hugged Jerry Jones or Chris Christie.
- He didn’t point to heaven, pound his heart, or emit a primal scream.
- He never referred to the “changing landscape of sports.”
- He didn’t belittle the inane questions asked by beat reporters.
- He never spoke about himself in the third person.
- He was never less than a credit to his number, his team, and his profession.
